She's Still Awesome to Me

Did you ever have a dog (or a cat or a hamster or a little brother) that joined the circus? Yea, me neither. I would just come home and find the top of my hamster or mouse or gerbil cage busted in and there would be blood on the inside of the glass and hamster or mouse or gerbil parts strewn about the room.....Imagine the horror. I recently was able to relive those feelings when wife informed me that daughters ribbons from 'nastics were not from doing rolls and leaps and bounds. Daughter got four ribbons for attendance. Yup. You see it happens like this: I have been called by a friend of mine "the whitest black guy he knows" (growing up skateboarding and listening to Jane's Addiction, Suicidal Tendencies, RHCP, The Smiths, et. al. will do that to you). In addition my wife is mixed (I know you just said mixed-ded!); her dad was black and her mom is German (and her grandma had a Nazi lamp!). So, daughter is pretty much destined to never know how to dance. Or play basketball or be in a music video or drink Olde English while sitting on a porch. Or leap or bound. She does roll well though. So maybe one of the ribbons is for 'nastics skills. And the other three are for showing up on time. Great. Bye-bye Subway sponsorship. Oh, and don't be shocked 'cause I made black "jokes." I know you were thinking it.